Oh yeah, and eat it

While I'm thinking about it, and am in a horrible mood, I hate it when people have the nerve to tell me what I can and can't post on the Internet.  I don't post horrible rape scenes or nude photos.  I post things that mean something to me.  I post things that inspire me.  I post things so I don't forget something I saw.  I don't post things to piss people off.  If you don't like what I do, then don't follow me.

I've learned this a long time ago.  I have a friend who I love dearly.  She has a habit of tweeting about things that are not among my interests at times that never seemed appropriate for me. I also followed her on my phone. I would be have an intimate moment, and my phone would go off.  I'd be in the middle of an argument, and my phone would go off.  I was trying to sleep, and my phone would go off.  I hold no ill will towards this friend, however, I was getting so irritated by these tweets.  Instead of getting mad about it, I chose to no longer follow her on my phone.  I still follow her on Twitter. 

I see no harm in this.  I'm also not a good person.  So now that I got that bit of my chest, I feel like I can use the Internet more freely now. 

Also, here is a picture of me being lonely.  BTW, I just a good chunk of my hair off.  Enjoy!

Lonely

I haven't posted a blog in a year.  I haven't felt inspired.  Have you ever felt that?  You do something you want to do, and because no one pays any fucking attention to it, you just feel like it's no use?  That's me, obviously.

I'm alone on a Saturday night.  I don't have anyone to hang out with.  I said good-bye to them.  Correction, I felt I needed to drift away slowly as to not hurt a friendship, and my friends apparently felt offended by it (after months of offending me personally).  Fuck them.  I don't need shit like that.  I'm a 23 year old woman.  I don't need people in my life that bring me down.

But then again, everything brings me down.

I bring me down.
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V

Down to the ground.

Why do we always have to say "goodbye?"

Why can't we just always say "hello?"

So I'm home from my vacation, and I'm pretty much heartbroken. I feel totally distraught. On the way home, in the back of my parents' car, I just started out the window and watched my soul get torn out of my chest and plastered on the bare trees on I180. I had time to think about myself this whole trip. I wanted to find who I was. For the past 8 months, I couldn't find myself. I was buried in a hole somewhere and I didn't know where. Mansfield, however, made me figure it out. I know who I am.

First of all, I'm not a Jersey girl, by any means. I hate the beach. I hate being in crowded places. I get carsick in traffic. I'm not an aggressive driver. Most of all, I'm not an uber liberal, and my off-colored views of the world just don't seem to match those around me.

Who am I? I'm Gen Taylor. I'm pretty street smart. I figure things out easily, and I understand people well within the first 20 minutes of meeting them. I'm a complete asshole, and love to poke fun at you while you're down. However, I will do just about all I can to make sure my friends are alive, happy, and well. I can listen well. I give good advice. I know how to cheer people up most of the time. I have a solution to everything. I'm Gen Taylor, and I love who I am.

As I said my goodbyes, I finally realized what I meant to these people. I'm Dan's best friend. I'm Renee's fake mom. I'm Scott's other brain. I'm Amanda's nightmare friend that wants her son to be gay. I'm the love of someone's life (he knows who he is, and I'm not going to embarrass him on my blog), the girl he can't stop thinking and talking about, and the girl who got away. I'm Liz's punching bag (and I'm not mad about it. I actually kinda enjoy it). I'm Carol's co-host. I the reason why Becca met the love her life (maybe I'm giving myself too much credit). I'm the teacher's pet, and I'm that cool chick friend most guys love having around. I'm a radio star. I've got heart, and soul, and dedication.

Yet, Jersey takes all these things away from me. In Jersey, I'm not a mother to anyone. I don't share a brain with anyone. No one has kids. No one uses me as a personal punching bag. Most of the things that I am don't apply here.

I watched my soul die today on Rt. 15. I watched it die on I180. By the time we hit I80, I knew my soul was gone. I knew the person I loved has died; me.

There's a lot of people I didn't say goodbye to today. That's because I didn't want to watch myself die again. I'm sorry I took the pussy way out, guys. It's best if my exit was quiet.

I'm back to my Jersey life now. I'm making it manageable. I have some things I still have to live for. I have my awesome brother, my cousins, Jackie, and Brian, and Danella, and Lauren, and Christina, and Matt, the few friends I have that I enjoy. I have an awesome boyfriend at the moment that I hope to keep around for awhile. It's what I got, and I love it.

Why do I always have to say "goodbye?" I want to only say "hello", and keep everyone around forever. I want my soul back, but I'll never get it. It lives in the streets of Mansfield, PA, wandering and looking for me to come back. I'll be whole again soon. Maybe I'll go back to that shitty little town where the sun never shines and pick my pieces back up. Maybe I'll find myself in something new out here.

This is my goodbye to the life I loved and can't have again. I miss you all already, and hope to see you all before this life ends and a new one starts for me.

Sorry to be so depressing, but at the moment, it's what I've got.

4 20?

So since I don't do illegal drugs, who's excited about celebrating 4 20 my way?

First, you wake up at any damn time you feel like it. Why? Because today is your day. Then you go and raid the fridge for something to eat. Some of the best things to pick out are cold pizza, leftovers, and bagels. After consuming the item you picked out, you are now ready to start your day.

Before you walk out the door, make sure you are wearing brightly colored clothes so the whole world can see you. Brush your teeth, do something funky with your hair. Then walk out the door, go to the closest busy street, and do the YMCA on the street corner. That's right, YMCA on the street corner. Do this until you make enough money to go to Sizzler's for dinner or until you pass out.

That's what I think everyone should do on 4 20. Just sayin'.

So after waaaay too much pregaming and waaay to many beers at the bar, I'm totally hung over. I believe I woke up at 5:30 this morning and started drinking water right out of the faucet, with dirty dishes centimeters away from my face. Totally sexy... lol

Anyways, not too many exciting things have gone on today. Mostly, I'm doing nothing but coffee with an old roommate from college and possibly raiding the radio waves. If you're interested in listening in, go to http://www.wnte.com/. I should be on from 9-11 on the Invader Scott Show.

My Etsy shop needs some love. Here's some stuff.

Mansfield, the place where the sun never shines.

Sorry I haven't kept up with this as much as I wanted to. I've been keeping myself rather busy with the usual. Work, boyfriend, tv, you know, the good stuff.

So this week is my vacation in Mansfield. Back to college I go. I came back last December, but it was only for a couple days, and had a friend from home with me. Now I'm back and ready to do what I wanted to do; live, laugh, and love.

My parents dropped me off by 6pm Saturday in the pouring rain. Of course, this is Mansfield: the town where the sun never shines. It's evil, horrid, and I'm still asking myself why this is the place I'd like to vacation at.

So I'm staying with my friends Dan, Linda, and Renee. Dan has been a really good friend for a couple of years (why, I don't know. I've done horrible things to this pour kid.) and he always lets me crash on his couch. Linda and Renee live in the house, and are absolutely wonderful. Within 15 minutes of being in Mansfield, us girls chased Dan around the house with a banana (because he's allergic to them.)

To the left shows the banana on the door. :)

I love this house. So the night continues on with some friends coming over, and me being drunk at 8pm. Go figure. I'm in Mansfield for 2 hours, and I'm hammered. Go me. After hurling into the bushes 4 times, I'm in great shape to go to the bar and run into more people I know. Luckily, I sobered up so I wasn't a hot drunk mess as usual.

Today, Sunday (even though I'm aware it's Monday morning.) we made waffles.... yum, waffles, and Renee's mother came over and talked politics with us. I don't know if any of you know this, but I just don't care about politics. I know I should, and it's important, but I really just don't care to share my beliefs about them with a whole lot of people, and especially not over the Internet. I offend everyone with my political views. However, I was told that Donald Trump's newest wife was apparently born in a communist country. That's awesome. Keep running for president, Mr. Topee.

Then, we got to see.... the baby. One thing I think you should all know about me is that I love a good bet. I don't bet on sports or cards, nothing like that. I like to bet on life situation. I live to bet on life situation. I made a bet with my friend, and the result was that is she gets pregnant and it's a girl, she was to name it after my and my friend Liz. Well, she got pregnant, but it was a boy. His name is Parker. I HATE babies, but this kid was adorable. Go baby Parker!

Here is Parker with his mommy, Amanda. Isn't this adorable!

So when I heard that Amanda and I were meeting up, the first thing I asked was if I could eat baby Parker. I don't know why; it's just a joke I said for years. So what did I try to do upon first seeing him? This.....

This is as close as I came to eating the baby, don't worry.

So now what the weekend is over, I have a week to run into people I'd like to see or have been avoiding like the plague. I can't wait to see what this is like :)

Until next time, guys, don't eat babies, and watch this honey badger.

Happiness

Wow, so I think I'm finally happy about things that are going on in my life, for once. My friends aren't assholes, neither is my boyfriend (wait, what the hell am I talking about? He totally is! But in a good way? Is that possible?), and I'm not taking shit from anyone. Awesome, right?

So I made a treasury yesterday, and I found this:

I want it soooo bad. Can I have it? Guess where my next paycheck is going......

In case you haven't noticed, I love giraffes. I don't know why, I just do. And look, the giraffe is a zombie! It's deadly and cute! And missing an eyeball....

What else have I been up to? Not a whole lot. I'm working on some t-shirt ideas for my shop. This means I have to make my own templates, which is proving to be quiet a challenge. I never knew exacto-blading a piece of cardboard could be so hard! If I get any of these right, you'll see pictures. I promise.

So I really would like some input. Does anyone here use Twitter? I recently have become an addict. I want to know what the worst trending topic is. The one I use all the time is #boomroasted. I want to know what trending topic have you seen that upsets you, angers you, makes you cry, and etc. I'm thinking of the worst one right now. If you can guess what it is, and you're not my boyfriend, you'll win something! How does that sound?

If you can be the first to guess what horrible twitter trend I'm talking about, I will send you this coffee sleeve:

If you were one of the makers of the trend I'm thinking of (JACKIE!) you can't win. So come on! Guess! Leave it in the comments.

So let's add some items from my shop so they can get some love. My real job sucks, so help me survive! hahaha

Kissing a roach?

I have watched waaaay to much America's Next Top Model. Speaking of which... I finally got to watch Wed. episode this morning, and I'm a little annoyed. I don't know if I like the idea that one of the girls get a free car as a prize win. I don't know... I think it's a little too much. You're suppose to win a car if you win everything on The Price is Right, not in the middle of ANTM for a weekly challenge.

Anyways, so I cruising Etsy today, and found this awesome necklace:It's really cute, right? But look at what the title of this post is.... and the 1st sentence.... I watch way too much ANTM. Doesn't it remind you of this moment?

Yes, I'm referring to Jade kissing the roach. I want that necklace soooo bad now!

I just thought maybe someone would enjoy this just as much as I do.

Bucket List?

This is a scary thought. I'm 22 years old and I've already thought about my bucket list. You know, "the things you'd like to do before you kick the bucket." Thank Jack!

I realized that at my young age, I've actually thought about those things. I guess that's what months of unemployment do to you, right? So what do I want to be before I die?

1) I'm a huge TV gal. I'd like to watch every series that I've ever even thought of seeing. This list is for another post, at another time. It's too damn long.

2) I'd like to write something the public will see or read. A book, a movie, a tv show, or maybe just an awesome blog. Who knows?! I'd like the world to know what is in my brain. It's pretty fascinating.

3) Get married and start a family. I know I want this. I know I want a loving husband and 3 or 4 kids. That'd be nice, right?

4) I'd like to finally get to Hawaii. That's the only place I actually care to visit. I really don't want to travel to a foreign country or anything. I have no desire. Hawaii, though..... I'd like that.

5) When things settle down in my life, I'd like to move out to the country. I would love to sit on my front porch in a rocking chair, knit, and watch large amounts of dust blow by in front of me. That'd be ballin' right?

That's what I'd like to see and do before I die. Is it simple? Possibly. Do I care? No.

So I'm looking forward to a fun and exciting weekend. My new boyfriend who is allergic to all of my animals is suppose to come over tomorrow.... that'll be a story. Granted, this is the kid who on our first date shot a straw wrapper in my eye. He did it again last Saturday and tonight, as a matter of fact. Great guy!

Also, my mother won't be home. My weekend will be full of doing nothing and making more things for the shop. The only part that sucks is she's taking my camera with her..... I really need to invest in my own. Damn it, Mom!

So, just to make sure I get some more exposure in my shop, here's another new listing from the past 5 months. Get hype!

And sometimes I make things... dissappear.....

Yeah, I haven't updated this in awhile. I'm aware and mildly ashamed. Life had me busy. Unemployment had me busy. But finally, I've been inspired again.

Depression... What do you think it is? I feel that depression is when you realize your whole life is meaningless, and is sinking in around you. Depression is when you reach up for help and the only thing you grab is air.

Depression.... that's where I've been for the past 5 months. Sorry guys.

Anyways, onto happier and brighter days, such as ice cream. Who doesn't love ice cream?

The shop has been doing alright. I'm moving a lot of things out of my hoarder room, so I guess the shop is doing what I expected it to.

The main point of starting my craft shop was because I have all of these materials sitting in my room and I'm not using them. The most effective way to use them would obviously be to sell the materials, but what's the fun in that? Hence why we have theworldfamous.etsy.com.

So if you're reading this and want to help me pay off my college loans that are drowning me, go to theworldfamous.etsy.com.

I kinda sorta have a job. I'm suppose to work at a research center as a phone interviewer. Unfortunately, it's not super stable, and I've been sitting here, waiting for hours. I believe I start work April 14th. I go on vacation to Mansfield, PA the 16th. Does that sound even remotely fair? Of course not!

Anyways, so here are some new items that are up in my shop. If you are interested in buying, please do so. As a matter of fact, if you are interested, I will give you 10% off your order. Use coupon code "RETAIL10". I will do free local pick-up, as well. I live in Central Jersey.

So here it is! New in my shop!

First Real Sale!

I am so darn excited about it! I can finally say that I actually did something. Someone gave me money, and I give them an awesome hat. Say goodbye to the Rocket J. Squirrel hat!

Yay! And my cousin was a great model. Thanks Steph!

So I think I need to get more models. They never seem available like I'd like them to be. This is when I wish it wouldn't cost me $1,000,000 to find a ANTM girl.